so what happened to us actually writing on this thing?

the perks of being a butthole… there aren’t that many

so lately, I’ve been a real jack… we’ll just say I’ve been being a butthole. I’ve noticed over the past few days that my attitude is relatively pissy, mean, and cynical.

Granted, part of that can just be attributed to survival in the 3510, but most of it is abnormal to me. I’m not typically this type of guy.

I don’t know specifically what is causing it.

It could be the residual repercussions of the sin issues I dealt with earlier this week. It could be part of my lackluster demeanor towards all things Go Camp. I’m just not sure

I liken it to the time I swore off coffee… except instead of bipolar sadness, its bipolar pissed-off-ness.

You’re my boys. This is where I am.

(the only perk of being a butthole, is I don’t feel as walked on… but rather I feel like I’m the one doing the walking… thats probably not good either.)

not as excited as I expected to be

go camp

Luke 6

This is pretty ridiculous right? seriously thinking about applying these verses to my life seems pretty ridiculous. It sounds like i will really have to change the way i think. I was walking back to my jeep tonight and had $1200 worth of stuff in my there and was thinking about what I would do if i saw someone digging in my jeep getting out my amp or guitar… beat the crap out of the probably.. guess that says a lot about the importance of scripture in my life.

i’ve realized that i assume scripture is easy to apply.. and i usually don’t run across scripture that i have to try hard to keep..  but this hits me. 

 27“But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you,28bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. 29If someone strikes you on one cheek, turn to him the other also. If someone takes your cloak, do not stop him from taking your tunic. 30Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. 31Do to others as you would have them do to you. 32“If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even ’sinners’ love those who love them. 33And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even ’sinners’ do that. 34And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even ’sinners’ lend to ’sinners,’ expecting to be repaid in full. 35But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked.36Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.

do you find it hard to tell when the Holy Spirit is telling you to do something and when its your own self telling you to do something?

i find myself in this position alot.. and it usually happens like this:

i’ll be chillin, feel like i should do something, like.. idk lets say pull over to talk to a homeless person.. or whatever, but i can’t figure out if it was the Holy Spirit who told me to do it, or if it was my own self convincing me that i should pull over…

so then i get in a head/heart panic attack because i don’t want to disobey the Holy Spirit.

…………

this is hard to explain.

and i don’t think that specific instance is going to screw me, since having a conversation with a homeless guy can’t really hurt me spiritually speaking. and even if God wasn’t telling me to do that, it’s not a bad thing.. you know.

however, i don’t want to default to, “okay well i feel like i should do something, and even though i can’t tell if it is the Holy Spirit or myself, i’m going to do it anyway.”

because if i keep doing that, i’m going to blur the line between my own thoughts and God’s spirit talking to me…

gah this is really confusing isn’t it?

i realize this might not be coherent.

anybody?

the man message

tonight was so good for me. 

 

Making my Comeback

So you can all go ahead and say it… I suck at posting on this thing… i’m sorry its been a couple weeks since I posted something.  Anyways, here is an attempt at a post.  I was sitting in my truck before work reading a little ditty and came across this passage…

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”  John 16:33

When I think about this, it makes my everyday worries and stresses pretty much meaningless.   I mean Jesus was speaking this to the disciples because He had just got through telling them of His death to come.  When thinking of this passage in that perspective, it really seems dumb not to trust Jesus with everything… the good and the bad… I mean He overcame death… He overcame the world that causes my troubles and stresses.  To be completely honest, I will probably let this slip through my mind soon like it usually does, so if you see me complaining about something just say, “hey man, Jesus overcame the world, have you talked to Him about that little problem?” Oh well thats something i’ve been thinking about… and of course Klash’s post about Luis on his blog that makes me feel more and more selfish everyday. And just so you all know, I do have to work again tomorrow until 8:30, but i’m gonna try to get out a few minutes early and hopefully you will all be hanging out still, so i’ll come find you if so.

communion

I think tonight at church was the most meaningful communion for me that I have ever taken part in.  It has always been a struggle for me to break this sacrament out of ritual, even with using better tasting bread and dipping it in juice rather than using those gold plates and tiny plastic cups I used to stick my tongue in growing up.  I don’t really know why…I’ve always taken it seriously and its always been a special thing for me.  I guess tonight was just the first time I kind of put all of the pieces together.  I stood there and I thought about the beautiful mystery of the Holy Spirit indwelling us.  God actually lives inside of me!  It is His life that is taking root and working itself out of my body of death, making me new.  I realized again that any good that comes from me is straight from His Spirit inside me.  It humbled me and gave me great courage.  As I chewed the bread, I pondered the unity of Christ in me, the vine and the branch.  I felt the depth of my neediness and marveled at the significant weight of a soaked pinch of bread.  What an endlessly special symbol Jesus has left us to feast on until His return.

Romans

Somebody, I think it was Piper, once did a sermon series on Romans entitled, “The Most Important Letter.” For whatever reason, I’ve often agreed with that sentiment. To me, it seems a lot of our foundational thoughts on theology and soteriology come from this portion of Paul’s work. The bad part? I realized I’m actually quite unfamiliar with what this letter actually says.

Yeah, I know “Romans Road” and select passages here and there, but as a collaborative work, my understanding comes up way short. This was surprising to me, especially considering the countless times I referenced it during Bible college. So, starting a few days ago, I committed myself to studying the epistle.

I’m already confused.

I don’t know if its the NASB, or what, but I am having some serious trouble following what Paul is saying. At one point he’s talking about God’s wrath on the unbeliever and then jumps to believers judging others and then onto numerous references (which I only assume are interrelated) to the Law and sin and so forth. My biggest problem is connecting the dots between all the concepts. I can grasp (I think) what he is saying when I separate everything into unrelated sections, but trying to see what the letter as a whole is communicating is really difficult.

So, I write this for two reasons:

1.) If any of you can give me a hand with this, I’d really appreciate it.

2.) If any of you want to study it with me, that’d be really cool too.